Date: Sun, 30 Nov 1997 14:42:00 -0800 (PST) From: Emily Miller Subject: Before: White Christmas 1/3 E.MILLER ARCHIVE: Anywhere, but ask first. ************************************************** DISCLAIMER: ... ************************************************** SPOILERS: None **************************************************CLASSIFICATION: VA RATING: G ************************************************** SUMMARY: Dana is chosen to sing in her school's holiday program and gets more help from her brothers and sister than she ever expected. ************************************************** Before: White Christmas 1/3 E.Miller ************************************************************************************** MONDAY THE CHOSEN ONE Dana was praying. Not something for something she really thought God would listen to, but it was worth a try. Mrs. East was announcing who had gotten parts in the skit her second grade class had been chosen to do for the Christmas program before school let out for the holidays. "That's everybody. If I didn't call your name, you can help backstage, if you choose." Dana tried to keep her sigh of relief quiet. If she'd gotten a part, she knew she would have died. Getting up in front of people, hundreds of people... stage fright, that's what she had. Her relief lasted all of 10 seconds. "Dana, can I talk to you?" Mrs. East asked her as the other students went back to their reading books. Biting her lip and already worrying, Dana got up and walked to Mrs. East at the front of the room. Maybe she was just going to be assigned an important backstage job, like director. "Dana, I've noticed how clear your voice is when you're reading or telling an answer aloud. When I mentioned this to the other teachers, Mr. Johnson- the fourth grade teacher- was wondering if you would sing at the program. I told him you'd probably love to, but I should check first. Will, you, Dana?" She didn't know what she could say. Getting up to SING in front of all those people was even worse than being in the stupid skit! But Mrs. East was sure she would agree. "I guess I could," she said. "Thanks so much... Do you know 'White Christmas'? That's the song Mr. Johnson said he wanted to have but just couldn't get his class to sing." "I know it." "Go home and practice tonight. You have a week to get ready." "I know." "You can go back to your seat now." She walked back much more quickly, because if anybody had said any kind of congratulations she didn't know WHAT she would have done. She did NOT want to sing! She kept her head as close to her reading book as she possibly could and still be able to read the words. Not that she was able to read, anyway, but she had to at least pretend. She managed to get through the rest of reading and then spelling, and finally the bell rang. She was the first one out, running to get on the bus before anybody else. That way she could just sit in the back and be by herself. She almost managed it. She was the second one on the bus- the first was Bill. He was in the very last seat, looking like he was just as miserable as she was. She could live with sitting with him, so went back there. "I don't want to talk to anybody, Dana," He said. "I don't either. That's why I came back here." He moved his bag over enough that she could sit beside him and they watched from the back as other kids got on. Missy came on with a bunch of her friends but didn't give her siblings in the back more glance than she gave anyone else. The bus driver took her time deciding to wait and see if anybody else got on, waiting until there was practically nobody anywhere near the school. Then she jerked the bus backwards to turn it around and pulled out into the real street. "I'll tell you what's wrong with me if you'll tell me what's wrong with you," Bill said. "You tell me first," Dana said. "It's your class who's doing the play, right?" "Uh-huh." "Guess who gets to be Santa Claus?" "YOU?" She almost laughed, but bit the inside of her mouth and managed to stop it. "Yeah... so what's wrong with you?" "I'm not in the play, so Mrs. East wants me to get up in front of everybody and SING!" "Sing what?" "White Christmas... do you think we could talk Mom into letting us go to a private school?" "And start before Christmas? Doubt it. Don't worry about singing, Dana, you'll do great." "Yeah, and you'll be a good Santa." "Oh, THANK you." She got a kick for that, but didn't kick back. She was feeling a million times better. Until she got home. The driver, as usual, let them off at the very end of the neighborhood, even though she was going right by their house. She said she didn't have time to stop at every kid's house, even though nobody else got off where she DID stop. Missy stopped and waited for Bill and Dana after they got off and the bus left. Without her friends there, she didn't care if they were seen with her or not. "Why were you guys sitting in the back?" she asked. "Because," Bill said. Dana trusted that he wouldn't tell Missy the truth unless she told him to. At least not HER truth. "Because why?" "Just tell'er, Bill," Dana said, knowing she would find out eventually, anyway. She didn't want to hear what Missy would say in reply, though, and so walked ahead of her brother and sister. And still, she heard. "Dana and I have both been asked to do special parts in the school's Christmas thing." "Lemme guess, you're Santa and Dana's gonna sing." Dana's eyes widened, but she didn't turn to let Missy see her surprise. One of her friends had probably been listening to their conversation and had gone to the front of the bus to tell her... "My teacher told us that one of the second graders was gonna sing with us. And I already knew they needed a sixth grader for Santa," she said. Dana could imagine her shrug as she said it. "Hey, Dana, wait!" Dana heard Bill call, and she realized that she was far ahead of them now. She stopped to wait. They caught up seconds later, and Missy said the one thing neither Dana or Bill would have EVER thought she would say. "I'll help you get ready, Dana." Dana turned to look at her sister to quickly that her hair almost hit Bill. He dodged the flying pony tail just in time. "Really?" "I can play a lot of Christmas songs on the piano... you know how Mom likes me to practice, so I'll be doing what she wants and helping you at the same time. What're you singing?" "White Christmas." "I can play THAT. That's easy." "Wow, thanks, Missy-" she was going to say more, but 5 year old Charles, who went to morning kindergarten, came racing over to meet them. Dana realized for the first time how close to the house they were. "Dana! Dana, Mom wants you!" He was saying loudly as he pulled on Bill's backpack to try and make them hurry. Dana, worried, took off towards the house. She threw her stuff on the floor and called, "Mom?" "In the kitchen, Dana!" She went more slowly, because they weren't supposed to run in the house, back to where her mom was looking at the mail that must have come early. "Dana, I got a call from your teacher today." "I didn't do anything!" Dana immediately said, attempting to defend herself. Mrs. Scully laughed. "No, you didn't. Mrs. East just wanted to tell me that you father, Charles, and I should be at this Christmas program. But she said you'd tell me why. She said you could tell me." "Oh, that. Bill's gonna be Santa in my class's play and I'm gonna sing." "By yourself?" "Uh-huh." "Congratulations, Dana!" "Is it something good?" "It's great!" She was glad that she'd been chosen, REALLY glad, for the first time. "Really good?" "Really good, Dana." She grinned and ran off to tell Charles. ************************************************** "Dana, you've got to get higher," Missy said. She had played through that stupid song what seemed like a thousand times by now, but still Dana couldn't get it just right. "My voice won't GO higher!" Dana was just as tired as her sister of going through the song over and over, but wouldn't quit until she got it right. Unfortunately, Missy would, and then she would have nobody to practice with. "It does when you yell." "I can't get up there and YELL." "Okay, okay, just one more time tonight." She played more slowly this time, and on a lower scale. But Dana didn't even begin. "That's TOO low." So she went back to the way she had been playing. Dana, as usual, started off shaky. "I'm d-dreaming of a white Christmas... just like the ones I used to know..." She was doing her best ever. Her voice got stronger as she continued, until she finally sang, "And may all your Christmases be white..." "Better, but we should work on the beginning. Would you sing better if Bill and Charles sang with you?" Missy asked. "Maybe." So the brothers were dragged in, but neither complained. They wanted to help Dana do her best as much as Missy did. "Play lower this time," Dana said. Missy did, and the song was started yet another time. Although all of them started it, Bill stopped towards the end, and nudged Charles to make him stop, too, and let Dana sing alone. "I'm dreaming of a white Christmas... with every Christmas card I write... may your days be merry and bright... and may all your Christmases be white!" She bowed at the end, then laughed at herself. "This is weird," she said. "What?" Bill asked. "All of this." And he laughed, too, then Charles and finally Missy. Walking by on the way to call her husband and see if he would be home to see his children in the program, Mrs. Scully stopped to see what was so funny. "What's going on in here?" she asked. "Nothing, Mom," Missy managed to say between giggles. None of them had any more idea than their mom as to what was so funny. It just seemed like the right time to laugh. Mrs. Scully left with a strange look on her face. She wasn't completely sure that her children were completely okay- maybe listening to the same song one too many times!- but at least they weren't fighting. "Wanna sing one more time?" Charles asked. "Sure!" Bill and Missy said at the same time- and they all laughed again. Before: White Christmas 2/3 E.Miller ************************************************************************************** **************************************************************** TUESDAY THE FIGHT "Hi, Bill," Dana said the next day as her brother sat beside her in the school's small auditorium and tried to get as low in his seat as he could. They were having their first rehearsal and he had come from the sixth grade, where his classmates were working on their puppet show, to practice with the group he was performing with. "Hi, Dana," he said, and slumped down further. He was obviously not too comfortable being with the 'little kids.' "I don't have to sing 'til tomorrow," she said. "That's good. No offense, but I'm not sure you're ready to sing in front of even your whole class." "I'm not either." "William Scully? Is he here yet?" Mrs. East asked from the stage, where she was directing a group of kids on how to put up the 'backdrop' posters they'd made that morning. "I'm here." Bill raised a hand halfway into the air, then quickly pulled it back down. "Can you come up here for a minute?" He had no choice but to go, so got up and left. Dana was alone again. For a couple of seconds. Then one of the girls from her class, Kelli something - she - didn't - remember, came over and sat beside her. "That your brother?" she asked. "Uh-huh." Dana wasn't sure she liked Kelli much, because she was one of the kids that, in Missy's class, would be considered 'popular.' Dana was sure she would NEVER be popular. "You're lucky you have an older brother. I only have a baby sister." "Why?" "My best friend Jan- she's almost 10, she's in fourth grade- has an older brother, and she says you can wear their clothes and their friends like you." "She's a liar. I don't wear Bill's stuff and his friends usually like my little brother, not me." "She is not a liar! You're just a little stuck-up jerk. I hope you don't stay here very long, you're just a teacher's pet." "I am not!" Dana's temper was beginning to surface- the same temper that had gotten her so mad the year before that she'd almost broken Charles' nose pushing him into a wall. "You sure act like one." That was it. Dana grabbed Kelli's hair and pulled as hard as she could. And Kelli, typical girl, screeched. Then she fought back, jerking away from Dana and trying to scratch her. If she hadn't been trying to keep from getting scratched, Dana would have rolled her eyes. Why was it that all girls fought with fingernails? She almost calmly pulled back her arm and hit Kelli in the eye. Another screech. She was just getting ready for another shot while she could when her arm was suddenly jerked so hard she was pulled from her seat. Thinking it was one of Kelli's dumb friends, she kicked the person who'd grabbed her, harder even than she kicked Missy. "Dana!" Bill was shouting. She whirled to see who it had actually been that grabbed her and saw her brother trying to keep her from going at Mrs. East again. "Dana, stop!" She stopped, suddenly realizing that she would be in trouble for this, maybe even kicked out of school! Still on the floor, she pulled her legs to her chest, put her head on her knees, and cried. "She hurt me but I won," she heard Kelli say through her own tears to a friend. ************************************************** "Dana, why did you fight her?" Mrs. East asked as she, Dana, and Kelli sat on the rug she had at the back of the second grade classroom. "'Cause she said I was a jerk and that she hoped I wouldn't live here very long," Dana said. She had quit crying, angry again- Kelli was acting like her swelling eye was going to kill her and wouldn't stop sniffling. "You called my friend a liar," Kelli said. "Kelli, I'll get your story in a minute... Dana, was it really necessary to FIGHT for that?" "My dad says that you have to stand up for yourself and do what you have to, no matter what." "Did he ever tell you that meant fighting with other students because they called you names?" Dana hated it when teachers asked her impossible questions like that. "...No... But he said-" Mrs. East interrupted her. "I see what you were thinking, Dana. I'm not going to call your parents on this one, but if it happens again..." "It won't! I promise!" Dana said quickly, relieved that she'd gotten out of trouble. "But what about ME?" Kelli asked, unable to see the girl who'd called her best friend a 'liar' getting away with what she'd done. She smoothed her hair again where Dana had pulled it. "We'll call your mother and say there was a little accident- which it was." "What if I tell her the truth?" "Kelli, I can't stop you from telling her everything that happened. But if you do, and she wants to talk to me, I'm going to tell her the whole story- including your calling Dana names and fighting back instead of waiting for me to get there." "But-" "Not now. We have to get back and get our rehearsal done before William has to go back to class." She stood up and the girls followed behind her as she walked back to the auditorium, glaring at each other the whole way. ************************************************** "And then I started hitting her!" Dana said, thrusting her fist forward for emphasis. Charles, eyes wide, ducked her false-punch. Then he gave her a grin missing a front tooth. "I lost my tooth today," he said, finally able to tell her HIS big news. "That's nice... I was gonna knock out Kelli's teeth, too, but then the teacher grabbed me and guess what I did?" "What?" "I KICKED her!" "You really kicked a teacher? Really?" "Uh-huh. Hard." "I would never kick my teachers. They're nice." "By second grade, teachers are mean." "I don't EVER want to be in second grade!" "It's not so bad... c'mon, lets go practice my singing." "Can I sing too?" "If you want." They left the front yard, where they'd been watching the sun go down, and went inside the house. "It's warmer in here," Charles said to no one as Dana went off in search of Missy. She found her at the kitchen table, doing homework. Her desk had cracked when Bill had thrown a shoe at it when he was mad at her and she said she couldn't use it anymore. "Can we go practice my song, Missy?" Dana asked. "Not right now. I'm doing my math." "Later?" "Yeah. So go away." She went, sighing a little, to her room to find something to do. As usual, there was nothing new. She finally just grabbed a book and curled up in the corner of the room, for some reason her favorite spot, to read. She didn't read long. Bill and Charles were in the room seconds later- lugging their dad's ancient stereo. "White Christmas," Bill explained as he put on the dusty album. A second later, Bing Crosby came on, singing a hundred times better than Dana would EVER be. "It's Mom's music, she said she found it when she was going through old stuff today." "You can sing with it," Charles said. "Thanks," she said. "I'm done!" Missy called suddenly. "But tonight I'm going to practice with Missy," Dana said. "We'll come, too," Charles said. "I'm not. I have homework, too." Bill disappeared into his room while Dana and Charles went to join their sister by the piano. Before: White Christmas 3/3 E.Miller ************************************************************************************** **************************************************************** FRIDAY PERFORMANCE DAY Dana looked at Mrs. East, who smiled at her from the piano. She smiled back, took a deep breath, and waited for the music. It started way too soon. Don't start now... not now... "I-I'm dreaming o-of a w-white Christmas," she sang, very softly, to the other second graders. Her voice shook worse than it ever had before. "Just l-like the o-ones I used to k-know..." Mrs. East stopped playing. "Speak up, Dana." She started again, and so did Dana. This time, she raised her voice, but still stuttered. Again, Mrs. East stopped. "I'm going to go slowly this time, Dana, and you really concentrate on the words." "Okay..." She bit her lip until the music started. "I'm dreaming of a white Christmas... Just like the ones I used to know..." There was a loud crash, and suddenly she was in darkness. Something was on top of her, something big and heavy. She could barely breathe, so she screamed for help. She could hear, from her classmates, laughter. And Mrs. East saying that everybody had better get quiet. Then the heaviness was gone. She was safe- out from under the curtain, which someone had untied. She got up, hoping she didn't look as embarrassed as she felt, and looked around the auditorium. Most of the kids were still laughing. REALLY most- all but one. Kelli was just smirking. "Dana, are you alright?" Mrs. East asked her. "Uh-huh... What happened?" She was pretty sure, but she wanted to make sure that somebody would have had to untie the curtain for it to fall. "SOMEBODY untied the curtain. And I have a pretty good idea who." Good, Mrs. East saw Kelli's smile of victory, too. "Can I go sit down for awhile?" Dana asked. "Yes... let me go ask this person if they know what happened." She had not only gotten revenge, she'd gotten out of singing, too! ************************************************** The night arrived all too soon. Before she knew it, it was time to get dressed up for the program. Her dad had managed to make it home, and even he insisted she wear a dress. But it was okay. She really did want to do good tonight, and if a dress would help, good for it. She put on her green Christmas dress, the one she usually used for Church around this time of year, and let her mother French-braid her hair. She felt almost pretty as she sat with Missy, who was wearing black so she wouldn't be seen on stage crew, waiting for Bill to get his costume on. "You're gonna do great, Dana," Missy said. "I'm scared I'll mess up. Today at school I was stuttering and stuff." "I heard somewhere that if you mess up last rehearsal, you do better in the actual performance." "Really?" "Yep." They were quiet as they heard Bill coming, his black boots loud on the wooden floor. He'd refused to let anyone see his costume before that day. Missy and Dana couldn't help laughing as he clomped into the room, beard slightly crooked and his nose painted bright red. He'd stuffed his shirt, worn boots so big he had to tie them on, and covered his short hair with a longer white wig. "Ho-ho-ho," he said, sarcastically, to Missy and Dana as they tried to stop laughing. Then he hit them with his hat. "Stop, you'll mess up my hair," Dana said, suddenly serious. "DANA'S worried about her hair? Mom, call a doctor!" Missy said. "What?" Her mom poked her head into the room just then, looking confused. She didn't give Missy a chance to answer. "We're leaving now." The ride to school was too long and not long enough. Dana was excited, but scared to death. She wished, AGAIN, she'd just gotten a part in the dumb skit, like everybody else in her class. They arrived at the school, and she went with Bill and Missy backstage to find her group. Bill went to her class, Missy with the others working with sets, and Dana went to the fourth graders. "Dana, you're going to be the closing song, the last thing in the program," Mr. Johnson said. Dana liked him- she hoped they stayed long enough for HER to have him in fourth grade like Missy did. She liked being with the big kids, even if it made her feel like a baby. Before she knew it, the principal was on stage, greeting a sixth-grade girl who was going to announce each class. "First, we have the first grade class, doing the 'Rudolph' dance!" Dana wished SHE had gotten to be the announcer. The girl sounded like she was having fun. The first graders walked out in a sloppy line, did the dance, and came back. They were giggling the whole time they were up and when they came backstage. Dana thought they were stupid. Third grade, because they also did a dance, went out next. Then the second grade was called to do their play, with a half-mortified Bill, a group of fifth graders saying the poem 'A Visit From St. Nicholas', the sixth grade puppet show, and finally the fourth grade singing. Dana wasn't ready. She wasn't going to be able to do it. "Lastly, we have a very special performance by one of the second grade students," the announcer was saying now. She couldn't, couldn't... and she felt a hand on her shoulder. "You're gonna do great, Dana," Missy repeated her earlier words. "You can do it," Bill said. She smiled at them both, her courage regained. "Dana Scully will sing the classic 'White Christmas!'" The announcer finished. Dana took a deep breath and went out into the suddenly huge auditorium. She'd thought it was going to be hundreds of people- it was MILLIONS! Every person on the planet must be there. And they were... they were all clapping! For HER! She smiled as she stepped up to the already- adjusted microphone. Another deep breath as the music first began. Then: "I'm dreaming of a white Christmas... just like the ones I used to know... where the treetops glisten... and children listen... to hear sleigh bells in the snow..." She was doing it. She could hear her own voice, magnified many times, filling the auditorium. She felt like some kind of angel, a Christmas angel. "I'm dreaming of a white Christmas... with every Christmas card I write... may your days be merry and bright..." She took the biggest breath possible and let it all out on the last line of the song. "And may all your Christmases be white!" She was breathing hard, astonished at what she'd done, when the music stopped. There was more applause... THUNDEROUS applause... and she thought she was going to fall over dead. She'd done it! She had sang the whole song, and she'd done it well! And outside, snow began to fall. == "It's just so arrogant... to think this little backwater planet is it... that all that was put there as nothing more than our own personal light show." Ellie Arroway CONTACT